Ramblings of a Crazed Fool

Ok. New funny stuff:

The Matrix Revolutions. Condensed.

Here is something I whipped up for people who havent seen the movie. I think they should read this insead of wasting their money.

Part One: The script is entirely comprised of questions.
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Trinity: Will he be ok?
Other Person: I dont know. Stay with him, ok?

Switch to neo in a subway

Neo:Where am I?
Little indian girl: Im cute arent I?
Neo: Whats going on?
Little indian girl: Time to go.
Neo: huh?

Audience: WTF?

Neo: Who are you?
Indian guy: This is my family.
Neo: Arent you a program?
Indian guy: Arent we all?

Audience: WTF?

Neo:Where am I?
Indian guy: You arent here or there.
Neo: Oh....... What?
Indian guy: The Trainman is coming.

Neo: ok.

Audience: WTF?

Enter trainman

Trainman: Im a pointless character who looks like a dirty bum but I can beat neo.

scene goes to sarif trinity and morpheus at oracle

Sarif: Hello.
Trinity: Why are we here?
Morpheus: Oracle why do you look different?
Oracle: I had to make a choice. Actally the old actress died and the directors decided to make some crazy excuse the isnt there at all and doesnt make sense to try and pass me off as something that does make sense.
Trinity: ok...but why are we here?
Morpheus: We must go.
Sarif: I will come for no reason.

Audience: WTF?

The go to the Marovingians bondage party

Girl getting her nipple twisted: Ow.
Sarif: This place is weird.
Maro:Vat do you vant?
Trinity: Neo
Maro: no.
Trinity: Yes.
Maro: ok.


Audience: WTF?

They go to the weird subway and get neo

Part Two: where the movie should have started
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on the ship

Neo: Im awake.
Smith in guys body: me too
Captain: WTF happened.
Neo: stfu
Smith in guys body: I cant remember.

Audience: WTF?

Naobi:We need to get out of here.
Others:k

Neo: I gtg to machine city
Captain: No
Naiobi: yes
Captain: ok

neo and trinity go in other ship

Trinity: Oh nos! Its the smith guy!
Neo: ok
Smith Guy: I am in human form and ill kill you.

Audience: WTF?

Neo : no you wont
Smith guy: Ill blind you though
Neo : ok
neo gets blinded

Neo: Lets go
Trnity: ok.

they go to machine city

Part Three: Back at zion
--------------
General: we will die. GG us.
Council: ok. lets win.
General: ok

Kid: Im a kid.
Commander: I cant let you in my core, but your in.

Audience: WTF?

queue only good part of movie where people get brutally killed

Kid: I saved the day!

at machine city:

Trinity: I died
Neo: Noooooooo
Trinity: Im dead
Neo: but
Trinity: Im dying.
Neo: ok.

Audience: WTF?

Neo: I want peace.
Maching akira baby thing: no
Neo: yes
MABT: why?
Neo: because of smith
MABT: ok
Neo: i win.

Smith: Im a guy with many friends.
Neo: ok.
Smith: WTF I win.
Neo: gg noob you lose.
Smith: OMG WTF I WIN?
Neo: No.
Smith: Huh? Im not making sense dont hurt me!
Neo. I wont, but I still win by white light random power!

Audience:throws up

back at zion
Morpheus: yay! peace!
Naobi: My man.

General: No way, they are trixing us.

Kid: peace.
Everyone: yay!


Oracle: Hello
Architech: wtf is this scene about?
Oracle: its for stupid people who think this movie has some deeper meaning.
Little indian girl: im here too! BUT WHY! WHY AM I HERE! Hey look the sun.
Oracle: Good job little girl.
Architect: Im a machine

Audience: WTF? Gimmie my money back.

The Crappy End

FYI those who don't know the lingo:
FYI => For your Information
GG => Good Game; i.e. good bye.